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Haldane poem.

posted Jan 21, 2015, 4:12 AM by Ranmini Perera   [ updated Dec 2, 2015, 6:36 PM by Upali Salpadoru ]



Birth:-  5 November

1.

I wish I had the voice of Homer

To sing of Rectal Carcinoma,

Which kills a lot more chaps, in fact

Than were bumped off when Troy was sacked'

Yet, thanks to modern surgeon's skills

It can be killed, before it kills.

I noticed I was passing blood

Only a few drops not a flood

 2.

I asked a doctor, now my friend

To peer into my hinder end.

To prove or disprove the rumor

That I had a malignant tumor.

They pumped BaSO4

Till I could really stand no more

3.

The microscope returned the answer

That I had certainly got cancer.

So I was wheeled into the theater

Where holes were made to make me better.


 4.

The microscope returned the answer

That I had certainly got cancer.

So I was wheeled into the theater

Where holes were made to make me better.

 5.

So now I'am like two faced Janus

The only god who sees his anus

I'll swear without the risk of perjury

It was a snappy bit of surgery

My rectum is a serious loss to me

But I've a very neat colostomy.

 6.

So do not wait for aches and pains

To have a surgeon mend your drains.

If he says"Cancer" you're a dunce

unless you have it out at once.

 7.

My final word before I am done

Is "Cancer can be rather fun".

I know that cancer often kills

But so do cars and sleeping pills

So let us patients do our bit

To help the surgeons make us fit.

 8.

In India there are several more

With extra faces up to four

But both in Brahma and Siva

I own myself an unbeliever.

  
  

  




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